Knowing how to recover mentally after a car accident is crucial. Some people actually NEVER mentally recover from the accident, decades after the fact. Although it may be difficult, time heals all wounds. The key is to realize you are not alone being in a car accident.
When I was in a car accident, I immediately felt distraught and shock. How could this have happened to me? What if I had just left my home a couple of minutes earlier? What if I delayed my exit just 30 seconds later? Would this even ever happen?
Those were the thoughts that were running through my mind. The person failed to yield against a stop sign they had and therefore caused the accident. I put on the brakes as hard as I could but to no avail. She was too deep into the lane for it to matter.
Therefore, we ended up colliding. Before the accident, I considered myself a pretty confident guy. I had no fear of driving, I haven’t caused an accident in the past six years plus. However, after the accident, I immediately became depressed. And you can’t do anything about how you feel.
The accident causes you to feel emotions that you don’t control. That’s why knowing how to recover mentally after a car accident is crucial. You don’t want the car accident to permanently mentally scar you. Because I’ve seen it happen.
Flashbacks, nightmares, and general bad feelings happen all the time.
How to Recover Mentally After a Car Accident
Here are the tips on how to recover mentally after a car accident. Tips I’ve personally used myself to get over my accident.
1) If It’s Not Your Fault, Accept That It’s Not
In my case, the offending party got a speeding ticket. It was nerve wracking because when I called the police, they even hinted that they’re so busy they might not even make it. Then when it becomes time to fight it out with insurance, it becomes a case of my word versus her word.
In which case, I would have zero recourse to gain from them. Even if I didn’t cause the accident. Thankfully, the police came after waiting a solid 45 minutes or so. Then they gave her a ticket and I went scot free. Therefore, I knew that it wasn’t my fault.
However, I still couldn’t help but blame myself. What if I just left the haircut place 30 seconds earlier? What if I hadn’t even stepped foot outside that particular day? Why did I have to get a haircut that day? Even though logically, I knew it wasn’t my fault, emotionally, I couldn’t help but feel that it was.
To know how to mentally recover after a car accident, you can’t admit responsibility if it wasn’t your fault. No matter how much you feel like it was.
2) Go to Therapy
Everyone thinks therapy is this mind mumbo jumbo thing where all the therapist asks is, “and how does that make you feel?”. That’s wrong. I was skeptical at first as well given that I was never in therapy before. However, they do wonders for your mental health.
One of the biggest wake-up moments I’ve ever had was when I was complaining to her about how this accident made me afraid and fearful to even go outside. Cars scare me now. Then she gently, softly, and matter-of-factly said to me, “no. You have to drive in the city, it’s unavoidable”.
That’s when I started to realize and see a path forward. That’s when I realized that no matter how I’m feeling, I HAVE to drive in order to move forward in my life. I can’t move up in life unless I get back to driving. Driving in the United States is a necessity, not a luxury.
That’s when I forced and slowly accepted that driving has to be a part of my life, whether I’m afraid of it or not. That’s when I started to recover mentally after a car accident.
3) Sleep Well
This is easier said than done after you’ve been in a car accident. Sleeping well is impossible if all you can think about is your past car accident. If that memory seeps into your memory. I had a nightmare one time where I was in the exact same situation as my car accident but I was screaming instead.
How to recover mentally after a car accident has to start with sleep. That is a non-negotiable thing that you can’t neglect in your life. There is a definite link between depression and lack of sleep. You get depressed if you don’t get sleep on a normal day.
Imagine how much more you get depressed if you don’t get sleep after a traumatic accident. When do you feel happy? You feel happy when you take care of your physiological needs first, that comes first and foremost above everything else. There’s no hungry, sleepless, and thirsty person who is happy.
Sleeping well is very important on a normal day. It’s even more important than ever after an accident.
4) Don’t Talk to Others
Whether we like it or not, victims are not treated well anywhere. Society doesn’t care about victims, they just care about the winners. When I told everyone else that I was feeling depressed, generally bad, etc., everyone told me I was being whiny. No one wanted to hear it.
When you’re a victim, you don’t get treated well. Society thinks you’re just pretending or faking to be a victim. Keep the information to yourself from family and friend members. They will not take your complaints kindly.
Discuss with your lawyers who have a legally binding fiduciary duty to act in your best interests.
However, everyone else, don’t discuss. How to recover mentally after a car accident? You need to know how to not make your condition worse. Imagine how much worse I felt after everyone else mocked what I was going through. No one took me seriously even though I was legally and factually a victim.
It truly is a bad thing keeping information away from your loved ones. However, you have to at times. It’s for your own sake.
5) Listen to Your Therapist
My therapist gently said “you need to get back on the road”. She drew parallels between the lack of control I felt with the lack of control I felt in my personal life. She was understanding and shared her personal experiences with car accidents she endured. Yes, some therapists are downright awful.
However, there are some where you get lucky and you get good ones. I, fortunately, got a good one who was on my side every step of the way. Even through my limited appointments I’ve had with her, I still felt it was tremendously beneficial. Even though I’m not 100% recovered, it was still in the right direction.
Knowing how to recover mentally after a car accident starts with a therapist. They have experience dealing with all sorts of trauma, not the least of which is something that’s as common as getting into a car accident. After a car accident, you feel like the world is crumbing down at your feet.
And you need someone to walk you through it all. They are extremely helpful in doing so.
6) Slowly Get Back on the Road
You can’t turn on and shut down your feelings at will. How to recover mentally after a car accident requires baby steps. No one becomes an expert overnight or becomes confident overnight. It’s the accumulation of little things that make us feel a certain way.
Start small like getting groceries. It was even difficult for me to get groceries even though it was a 5 minute drive from my house because I drove through many similar roads that simulated my accident too much. I almost got in another accident as well and my heart was beating every time.
I don’t know how I got through it but I ended up getting through that dark period. It’s still not 100% comfortable for me to be out on the road because of racing heart beats. It may even take years before I’m 100% comfortable. Therefore, you need to start small and work your way up.
Then after months of driving, you may slowly start to do long distance driving. It may seem impossible right now but it is possible to get there.
7) Let Time Pass
Time heals all wounds. You can’t recover mentally after a car accident without adding time into the equation. Time doesn’t just heal physical and physiological wounds. It heals psychological wounds as well. Some psychological wounds and scars are not healable. However, most are.
As long as you’re doing the right things like taking care of your sleep, body, and work, then things fall into place. Let things be, they’ll turn out the way they’re supposed to. You can’t expect to solve the mental clout in just a single week. No matter how optimistic your nature is.
I thought my mental problems would be over after a month. However, that couldn’t have been further from the truth. I felt vulnerable, weak, and unable to make sense of anything and everything out of it all. It’s taking me MONTHS to recover mentally and even then I’m not sure if I’ll ever be done.
The pain and suffering you feel doesn’t go away overnight. It takes a lot of time before it does.
How I Recovered Mentally After a Car Accident
It took a LOT of time. Think months and months. The worst thing was that I was starting a new job at the time. Therefore, I didn’t just have to know how to recover mentally after the car accident. I also had to provide good value to my new employer and do good work as well.
We were in the middle of a recession and therefore, it would be a shame to lose my job AND financial losses due to the accident. I was desperately afraid that I would be on the chopping block so I put in as much effort as I could on the job. No matter how much I was hurting on the inside.
Then once I took care of my baseline level of work, I got to work on repairing myself. Mentally and physically. It’s a shame when someone else really does a number on you. And my accident wasn’t the worst accident that’s out there. Some car accidents are fatal.
How I recovered mentally after the car accident was I slowly took steps by driving short range distances for a month. Afterwards, I drove medium range distances for 2 months. Then long range distances thereafter. That slowly started to make me feel better when it comes to driving.
Driving on the highway was out of the question but eventually I recovered back. Then I talked to my therapists. Those sessions were the most helpful in getting me back on track. Then I took care of my body by working out 5x a week.
By strengthening my physical body, it seeped into my mental state afterwards. All in all, the bulk of the process took a solid 8 months and counting. It was bad.
Learning How to Recover Mentally After a Car Accident is Crucial
Without knowing how to recover mentally after a car accident, you can’t go back to your normal life. You can’t go back to doing the day to day stuff that you were used to doing. Going to the groceries is difficult. Taking a shower is difficult because it reminds you of what it was before.
The food doesn’t taste as great, you lose your appetite, and everything alike. Imagine it disrupts that part of your life and then it seeps into your work as well. You don’t want to be physically hurt then also be mentally hurt. Physical hurt is most likely temporary. Mental hurt is potentially permanent.
I know what you’re going through because I’ve been there before. There are a lot of risks when it comes to driving. However, we have to drive. We can’t avoid it just because there’s a nonzero chance of an accident. All we can do is mitigate the risk as much as we can and move forward.
You don’t want your whole world turned upside down after this. Yes, some days will make you sick to your stomach. However, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It will get better no matter how much you don’t think it will get better.
Yes, it is unfortunate you have to dig yourself out of a hole someone else dug for you. However, it happened and the best thing to do is figuring out what to do going forward. That starts with knowing how to recover mentally after a car accident.
You’re not alone and you never will be. It’s not the first car accident people have gone through and it won’t be the last.
How to Recover Mentally After a Car Accident Shortlist:
- If it’s not your fault, accept that it’s not
- Go to therapy
- Sleep well
- Don’t talk to others about it
- Listen to your therapist
- Slowly get back on the road
- Let time pass
